Tortured Hope
by Dazzled-Brunette
Summary: Bell is on the run from her abusive husband James and finds herself in Edwards medical clinic passed out on the floor. He cares for her and learns to deal with the emotional baggage she endures from a husband who tortures her to the point of death.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: This I my first shot at a Fan Fiction. I love to write and I hope its something that you all will enjoy. Here it goes.**

**I'm going to say this once, Stephenie Meyer owns Edward, Bella and all the other fantastic characters, not I. So dedicate all standing ovations and rounds of applause to her.**

**Tortured Hope**

**Chapter 1**

I was out of breath and my muscles ached to the point past fatigue. I could hear my heart pumping in my ears at a million miles per minute, but my body was on high alert. I was functioning on pure adrenalin; I knew if I slowed he would find me. I didn't notice the ache from my wounds anymore and but I knew I was losing a lot of blood. I needed safety and I needed it now. The moonless night made it even more difficult to navigate thought the dense woods and I kept tripping over large roots and exposed rocks. I lost my balance and fell adding more gash to my already tattered knees. In my last effort I crawled under a pile of fallen branches and listened closely for any signs of my tormentor. I felt as if he could find me simply by the loud thumping in my chest, I closed my eyes and tried to focus on slowing down my breathing and listen to the stumbling footsteps running in my direction.

"Come on baby, I know you're out here." He slurred

I held my breath and remained perfectly still

"I miss you already baby, I love you." He half chuckled "Bella Baby I need you"

I could see him from under the brush and I prayed he wouldn't look my way. He slumped against a tree nearly ten feet from my hideaway and brought the glass bottle to his lips. I could hear the evil liquid slosh on the insides of the bottle as he brought it back down to his side.

Then he began to eerily hum to himself our song we danced to at our high school prom. He then began to belting it out,

Oh can't you see  
>You belong to me<br>How my poor heart aches  
>With every step you take<p>

Every move you make  
>Every vow you break<br>Every smile you fake  
>Every claim you stake<br>I'll be watching you

He drew out the last line and almost speaking it and I covered my ears in hopes of drowning him out. He sat in against the tree and began laughing in hysterics. I couldn't stand the sinister sound that spewed from his mouth. I heard his bottle hit the ground and I looked to see him fallen, face first into the earth passed out. Silently I emerged from the brush and walked till I was at least a hundred yards from where he was. I tried to break out into a sprint by lost my balance and fell to the ground as the world began to spin. I could start to feel the pain from my injuries, I couldn't die here I wouldn't allow it. I was stronger that what James allowed me to believe, he was an evil and condescending man. I pictured his face and it only fueled me forward. After what seemed to be hours I came to a clearing in the trees to find a rail road and a train stopped on its tracks. Fumbling with the doors, I found an unlocked car and slid the heavy wood enough for me to slide my body inside. I closed the door only to find myself in complete darkness. I felt my way to the back corner of the car and leaned up against the wooden wall. My eyelids instantly became heavy and I couldn't keep them open anymore and I drifted off to sleep.

When I awoke the sun was streaming through the ceiling and I was instantly acknowledged of my injuries, slowly I began moving all the parts of my body to see just how hurt I really was this time. Starting at my feet I flexed each toe and rolling my ankles and continued up till I reached my elbows and hands. I wince as I moved my right wrist which was possibly broken, but that was the least of my worries. I looked down at my side and saw that the bleeding had at least stopped from the laceration starting from my navel and ending up under my arm pit. I peeled back my jacket I had used to tie around my stomach, and cried out in pain as it reopened the wound. I pulled my knees up to my chest and cried.

I had told myself while growing up that I would never be that girl, the one that lets her husband beat her just to make his pansy ass feel better about himself. I thought I could change him but I was wrong, and it got my here, dying in a box car headed to who knows where. Cradling my side I tried to peek through a hole in the boards to find any recognition of where I was. All I could see was a blur of trees and cursed to myself as the train jostled and I fell to the floor. I just laid there in agony until the train began to slow sometime later.

As it came to a halt, I pressed my ear to the door to listen for any noises of people walking by, hearing nothing I slid the door open and jumped not even bothering to shut the door. I ran to my best abilities to the trees and lay down in the bushes. I waited and watched as the train slowly began to move again and waited till it was out of sight.

The sun was beginning to set and I knew I needed to find help or I wasn't going to make it till morning, as it was my vision was beginning to blur and I was losing sensation to my limbs.

I could hear cars on a highway nearby and mustered up all that I had to keep going. I came out of the cover of the trees, to the faint dull glow of a sign from a Doctors Clinic across the street. I crossed the street and looked for the back door. I squatted down pulling the bobby pin I always kept from my hair. I heard the lock click and turned the knob, inside was dark and nobody as there. I made my way into one of the treatment rooms and fumbled through the cupboards for supplies. I could feel my consciousness fading and I quickly grabbed the rubbing alcohol and unscrewed the lid. I poured it straight onto my side and cried out in pain, it became so intense little black dots began to fill my vision till I completely blacked out.

In the faint distance I heard footsteps running towards me down the hall, I knew James had found me and that this was the end. I welcomed my bringer of death with open arms.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Sorry it took me so long to post. I work at Forever 21 and I have been getting ridiculously long shifts all week long. Thanks to all who commented on my first chapter it really meant a lot as a writer. It really inspired me to keep going. I'd love to get your thoughts on how to change the story, what you think it needs, and so on. I'm a very open person. Thanks again. Well here's chapter 2.**

**Tortured Hope**

**Chapter 2**

I woke up to an annoyingly loud beeping next to my ear. This was not the first time I had been in this situation, needles and tubes protruding from my arm and with no knowledge of how I got here. I slowly tried to open my eyes but shut them again due to the intense brightness of the room. Why they even make hospital rooms so blindingly bright is beyond me, maybe it's to counter act all the sadness and death that happens here. I heard footsteps and the knob to the door begin to open so I lengthened my breathing and pretended to still be unconscious. Who ever had entered my room began to check my vital while humming to themselves, it wasn't the eerie kind of humming I was used to; in fact it was beautiful and intoxicating at the same time. I couldn't help but try to lean in and catch more of the enticing melody. I heard him chuckle. I knew I was caught.

"I know your awake." He said with a voice like velvet.

I let out an audible sigh. "How long was I out?" I replied with my eyes still closed.

"Two days, you mind telling me your name and how you ended up here?"

I opened my eyes for the first time having to squint till my eyes adjusted. He finally came into focus. To say he was gorgeous beyond description was an understatement. His flawlessly sculpted jaw line was the epitome of masculinity with the perfect amount of stubble; I wanted to run my fingers along that jaw. He had high set cheek bones that only complemented my favorite feature; his eyes. I felt as if I was consumed by the vibrancy of his emerald eyes which bore straight into mine. I finally found myself gratefully praising the bright florescent lights as they brought out the natural highlights in this man's auburn honey-gold hair. My fingers ached to run through his hair which held an almost perfectly messy quality to it. I remembered that he was still waiting for an answer but all that came out was an unintelligible.

"Umnglumaneyma"

"Hmmm" he said in a completely serious tenor only doctors could master "I detect there might possible signs of brain trauma" he said making a note on his clip board.

All I could do was stare at him. He let out a small laugh.

"Just messing with you. All though I would like to gather your name and some personal information."

Oh dear goodness his laugh… and what an amazing laugh at that.

"My name is Isabella Mc…swwaa…Smith. Isabella Smith." I said matter of factly "But I prefer to go by Bella."

I didn't want to use James's last name nor did I want to use my maiden name. I still didn't know who this guy was, and I didn't want to put my trust in some stranger despite my bodies urge to trust him whole heartedly.

"Bella, I like the way that sounds," he replied with a smile, sending my heart in a flutter. Dang what a smile… "Well Bella _Smith, _if you're feeling up to it I'd like to ask you to fill out these forms when you get the chance."

He obviously didn't buy the whole Smith thing as my last name, but he didn't mention anything about it.

He handed me the forms and I reached out to grab them. Our fingers instantaneously brushed one another's sending a near shock all the way up my arm. I looked up at him and saw confusion sweep though his face, which he immediately covered up with another one of his breathtaking smiles.

"I'm going to need a pen." I said

Seriously Bella, that's the best thing you could come up with. I hounded myself it is her already thinks I'm strange.

He pulled a silver pen with an elegant E engraved on the side. It looked fairly expensive and I couldn't believe he would trust a complete stranger, such as myself with such an item. He extended it towards me.

"You may use mine." He exclaimed

"Thanks." I mumbled

"Ill be back in a little bit to check on you, if you need me, I'll be down the hall."

"Ok, Thanks again… I never caught your name."

"Its Edward but I prefer to go by Edward." He said with a smirked

"Oh very funny, make fun of the injured. In all seriousness, Thank you Edward."

"It's my pleasure." He said as he walked out the door

What a whirl wind of things to take in. I was sitting in a hospital room and being waited on by a beautiful stranger. The details of my most recent encounter with James were still fuzzy, and I was having a hard time recalling events. I was just glad to be away from him right now.

It's amazing how much a man can change over the course of a relationship. I guess I had plenty of warning signs he had always been jealous and possessive over me and became envious of all my family, friends, and co-workers and would constantly complain about any time I spent with them instead of him. He would also continuously accuse me of cheating or flirting with other men without reason, always asking where I had been and with whom. In the beginning of our relationship he was always so loving and caring; he would buy me flowers every other week and told me how whenever he saw something beautiful it made him think of me. I thought it was so sweet and I looked past all of his faults.

I guess that's my problem, I always try to find the good in others and I don't really see them for who they are. I even looked past how cruel he was to both his mother and younger sisters. That should have been the first major sign but every time he would call his sisters ugly or tell his mother how worthless she was I chose to ignore it due to how kindhearted and compassionate he was with me.

But after we were married it all became a horrendous nightmare. He was overly demanding of my time and had to be the center of my attention twenty four seven. He controlled our finances, the car, and the activities I partook in, and became angry if I began showing any independence. I was scared into being submissive to his every whim, and whenever he had a bad day he let out his stress on me. The abuse was progressively worsened till instead of yelling he began to hit me, the hitting soon became full torture sessions where I would be strung up in the garage and hit and cut with the various items he could find. My blood and my screams of agony only egged him on. If he ever found me, surely he would kill me, and that was my biggest fear.

I looked around the room for the first time and noticed how small it was for a hospital room even though all the equipment was very modern, some of the things looked so high tech I was afraid to even touch them, fearing I would break something by the slightest amount of pressure. There was a large window with expensive looking curtains obstructing my view to the outside and were heavy enough that I wouldn't even be able to tell if it was day or night. Below the window was a small maroon and beige striped love seat with four pillows, two leaning against each arm. There was a fairly large flat screen TV attached to the wall, which were painted a neutral golden color complimenting the dark wood flooring. If it weren't for the hospital equipment, this room could easily be mistaken for a five star hotel room.

I could hear a cart being wheeled down the hall and stopped right outside my room. The door opened to reveal a petit woman with short spiky brown hair. She smiled widely and pushed the cart into the room.

"Hi, I'm Alice" She said excitedly "You must be Bella." I just nodded "Well I brought you something to eat, as it's been two days since you've eaten anything and your probably starving. I know if I was you and I hadn't eaten anything for two whole days I would be beyond ravenous and could probably eat like 1 of everything off any menu."

I'd actually like to witness that, I thought to myself. She was so tiny I wondered if it was even possible. She would have to grow a second and possibly a third stomach to even make it doable. Then again the unlimited amount of energy and spunk she seemed to have would definitely be in her favor. Now that I think about it she could probably do it, she could do it and possibly do it without exploding.

"If you were a shoe, what kind of shoe would you be?" She asked. How she got to talking about shoes was beyond me, I was still picturing Alice shoveling in a Spicy Chicken Sandwich and a Frosty to cool it all down.

"A Pair of purple Vans" I said. She grined and said "That seems to fit you." She looked down at the cart and like a light bulb had gone off she said, "Oh yeah I brought you dinner, its grilled chicken, cooked carrots, potatoes, a salad and Jell-O. My mom just brought it by. The potatoes are really good, I tried some." she said innocently.

"Thanks Alice for the food, it was really thoughtful"

She wheeled the tray over my bed and removed the cover from the food. "Bon Appetite." She beamed and headed to walk back out the door.

"It was really great to talk to you, I can already tell we are going to be great friends." With that she closed the door.

I stared down at the food in front of me. What kind of place was this where Alice's mom was bringing food to its patients? I needed to know where I was and I needed to know now. Just then Edward walked back in the room.

"How are you feeling?" He asked

"Where am I?" I said avoiding his question.

"You are at my Private Medical Clinic in Forks Washington."

"Forks?" I asked completely oblivious to where that was

"Just outside of Seattle." He replied

"Hu" I sat wondering how on earth I made it from Boise Idaho to Forks.

"Where are you from?" he asked

"Arizona." I said a little too quickly

"Oh? What part."

"Phoenix." I think I might have relatives there, and simply, that was the first thing that came to mind.

"So what are you doing so far north?" he smirked

"Getting away from the heat, it's awful." I lied smoothly hoping he would believe me this time.

"That's what I hear, winters must be nice though."

"They're amazing, I've never had to shovel sunshine." I said trying to retract information from my previous visits to great aunts home, whose names I couldn't even remember.

He smiled "Must be nice, that is the worst part of winter. Feels like a never ending battle between me and the snow, and the snow always seems to win. Hey did you get a chance to fill out the paper work I gave you?"

"Umm." I muttered looking over to the side table where I had set them previously. He followed my gaze and said. "Take your time; you can do it after you eat your dinner. My mother's a wonderful cook."

"Alice is your sister?"

"Yup, for twenty irritating yet marvelous years. I love her dearly, and I'm grateful to have her."

"Thanks big brother! Love ya too!" we heard from down the hall

"Alice how many times have I said something about you spying on people's conversations."

"Its not my fault you talk abnormally loud." She teased

"A trait you carry and have amplified." He mocked back

"Whatever you just go back to flirting with Bella."

The look on Edwards face was priceless, he got all tongue tied, said a quick good bye and left the room. I sat and laughed, and it felt good. I missed laughter and the freedom to smile whenever you wanted to. So I did I smiled till my cheeks began to hurt and enjoyed every moment of it.

**A/N: Sorry it was not as exciting as chapter 1, but you know how it goes, you have to have the bread to hold together the peanut butter and jelly. Trust me there will be some more of that peanutty goodness in the future. **


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Here it is Chapter 3. I love hearing from you guys and it makes the biggest difference when I know that I will at least get a couple reviews. All of you have been super supportive so far and I want to thank you for that. I love to know what you guys think, and trust me I'm open to hearing your thoughts. I hope you enjoy this next chapter, I know I enjoyed writing it.**

**Tortured Hope**

**Chapter 3**

I stared at the piece of paper on the clip board, not really focusing on the writing on the page. Glancing over at Edwards's pen in my hand, I marveled at its elegance. The pen was heavy compared to an average pen and had to at least be solid silver. It was stunning, a beautiful pen for such a beautiful man. I wondered how much this pen was actually worth, $400 possibly more.

Looking back at the paper I began with the first question, Name: Isabella Smith. Birthday: September 13, 1987. Age: 24. Sex: F. Marital Status…..

I threw the clip board down to the end of the bed in frustration. I wasn't ready to give out my personal information, I didn't want my identity out in the open, I couldn't risk James finding me. It was life or death that my identity remained secret from anyone I met from here on out. I was on the run and could not afford getting close to anyone or even think about making friends to whom I could be traced back to, it would only be dangerous for anyone or myself that I became acquainted with.

I had to be on my own, a new identity, a new life, a new start.

It would all begin as soon as I could get out of here. I wouldn't let my personal ordeals bring harm to Edward, Alice or any members of his family. I was not worth the danger that would be introduced to them if I stayed. They were such amazing people, it was easy to tell just by the few encounters I have had thus far.

Especially Edward, everything about him is what I had pictured in the ideal man. He had gentle eyes that told a story of his life, by just looking into them. They spoke of sadness and triumph, longing and joy, but that is all part of what made Edward; Edward. He had a gentle touch and even the simplest brush would send my heart into a state excitement.

I would sincerely miss out on the opportunity to be his friend, but all that I could offer as a friend would be a broken and bruised girl who extends danger to whomever she meets. I needed to remove myself from their lives and quickly, as of now James could already be searching for me. It would be better to be found alone, I won't allow my problems to be the cause of harming someone else.

I tried to sit up in my bed completely forgetting about my injuries. A sharp searing pain shot up my side and tears instantly filled my eyes as I tried to breathe through the knife like sensations. I let out a small whimper; I was so stupid for letting my relationship with James get to this point. I was not his play thing to hit around, as of now I was a free woman. I would never feel the weight of his torment ever again. I would run from his control of my life and never look back. I'm ready to start a new life without James telling me what I can't do or beating me when I fail to perform at my best. I am no longer Isabella Gigandent, I am Bella, just Bella and I am what I choose to be.

I felt a sense of liberation as I realized I would never have to see James again. But my liberation party would have to wait because I was in agony from the pain in my side. I looked around my bedside for any chance of finding a pain medication button. A bright yellow sticky note with an elegant script came into view which instructed me to push for pain. Without hesitation I quickly grabbed it and rapidly pushed it multiple times. I could feel the white hot sensation from my side fade away and my eye lids became heavy. I didn't fight the urge to sleep, in fact I welcomed it, as I drifted off into the dark abyss of my mind.

It was dark, and I knew I was back in James's garage simply by the smell of it. It was a combination of a musky wetness and gasoline, it filled my nose, and it made me want to vomit just knowing what soon awaited me. I was tied down to his table in the far corner of his garage, the ropes were tied tight digging into the soft flesh of my ankles and wrists. I lay on the table in defeat, there was no way out of these ropes… I had tired so many times in the past, and my struggles for freedom only egged him on. I heard the familiar crunch of the gravel outside the garage from his heavy steal toe work boots. The same boots I have had many close encounters with, and prayed this would not be another one of those sessions.

I closed my eyes and tried to picture myself elsewhere, anything that could help distract me from my awaiting torture. God didn't see me here in this room; there was no hope in praying for his help. I had never received it the many times I had asked for it in the past. James always continued on beating and rapping me despite my pleas. I was alone and there was no one around who cared that I would soon be a bloody mess on this table.

The door creaked open, and I looked over in his direction. Due to the brightness of the moon all that was reveled was a silhouette of James's malicious body, and I swore I saw his eyes glow a vibrant red. He reached over to the light switch next to the wall and flipped it on. I blinked back the tears that threatened to flow.

"My Bella." He growled hungrily walking towards me. I turned my head towards the wall. He reached out and stroked his hand down the length of my arm, sending cold shivers rippling all the way up.

"Bella look at me." I refused and stayed staring at the wall. "Look at me you bitch." He screamed grabbing me ruthlessly by the jaw and turning me towards him. I closed my eyes forcibly and kept them closed.

"Fine just let me know when you are ready to look at me." He turned around walked over to his work bench, and picked something up off the table. There were two small clicks as he moved the blade of the box cutter to his preferred length. His tool preferences changed with his mood, so being that he had chosen a box cutter meant that tonight wouldn't be one of his worst.

At a painfully slow pace he walked back to the table to where I was tied down. I felt the cold metal against my shoulder.

"You know how much I love you right?" he questioned. With eyes still closed I turned my head away from him. "No?" he questioned "Let me show you." He said with a sneer and began to hum to himself as he leaned into my ear and whispered with the smell of liquor on his breath. "This is how much I love you." as he drove the blade deep into the exposed skin of my shoulder.

I screamed out in agony opening my eyes only to find myself back in Edwards's medical clinic. I was breathing rapidly and I could feel a small ache in my side. I reached up and wiped the sweat from my fore head. I hated that I let James get to me, and I hated living the nightmare he created in my life.

My door flew opened and Edward rushed in. "Are you ok?" he ask concern flooding his face.

"Yeah, why do you ask?"

"I could hear you scream all the way from down the hall."

"Oh." I said, looking down at the sheets "I'm sorry to have bothered you like that."

"Really it's no bother; I just wanted to make sure you were ok is all."

It was awkwardly quiet for a couple second, but I refused to break the silence.

"So are you? O..o..k that is." He stuttered

"It was just a nightmare." I replied

"Nightmares don't make people scream like you did." He said with worry in his voice

"Sorry."

"It's nothing to be sorry about." He exclaimed moving closer to my bed side. He smiled at me and then looked over at the computer screens. "I see you needed the morphine."

"Yeah, my side started to hurt pretty badly."

"How does it feel now?"

"Nothing I can't handle."

"But does it hurt?" he questioned

"Not too bad"

"You need to let me know you're pain levels in order for me to help you."

"Really I'm fine; I don't need any more morphine."

"Bella, just promise you'll be honest with me."

I couldn't look him straight in the eye; I wasn't making any promises to him that I couldn't keep. No, in fact I knew I could not be completely honest with Edward.

"I would like to look at how your wound is healing?" I simply nodded too embarrassed to say anything.

He moved over to the counter and grabbed a pair of gloves and slid them onto his hands. He then opened the cupboard and pulled out various items putting them on a portable stand with a tray and rolled them over.

"May I?" he asked politely, motioning to the edge of my hospital gown. I nodded.

Slowly and gently he moved the gown to reveal the bandages wrapped around my torso. The bandages were completely soaked through with blood.

"Have you been moving a lot?" He asked

"Not intentionally." I said

"Well you have ripped through some stitches and I'm going to have to redo them."

"kay." I mumbled.

He leaned over to reach for the morphine button before he began undoing the bandages.

"Nooo!" I screamed not wanting to return to the night mare of James's garage.

"I have to give you another dose of morphine, or you'll be wishing I had as I stitch you back up."

"Don't you have something else to numb it?"

He thought for a couple seconds... then said "Yes, actually… I've got something that will work, I'll be right back." He said as he reached out and gave my hand a gentle squeeze. I watched him as he walked out the door. I lifted my hand off the bed and looked at it while a current of electricity seemed to surge through my hand. I let my hand fall back to the bed and I stared at the ceiling till I heard his foot step walking back down the hall. My heart fluttered a bit when I saw him. He gave me a crooked grin and held up a syringe. "Here you go Ms. Got-to-have-it-my-way." He teased.

I cringed. "What…?" he asked with curiosity

"I hate needles."

He burst into laughter. "Really…?" he asked trying to calm down.

"Yeah. Really."

"Well it's this or the morphine, your choice."

I looked back at the button hanging by the computers and then towards the needle.

"Ok, stick me doc." He smiled and walked over and set the syringe on the tray. He then changed his gloves and began removing the soiled dressings.

I never looked away from his face as he proceeded to clean the wound, add a few new stitches, and then apply fresh bandages.

"All done here." He exclaimed with a small smile

"Thanks." I said still gaping upon his beautiful features.

His face instantly became solemn, and I already knew what was coming before he even said it.

"Bella, will you please tell me who you really are."

**A/N: whoooooah. Will she tell him or will she continue to protect him by keeping it secret. Well that will have to wait till next time. I will try to have the next chapter up ASAP but since Cali is taking preference right now we will have to see how that goes. Happy Summer everyone.**


	4. Chapter 4

**Tortured Hope**

**Chapter 4**

I didn't know what to say to him. How do I explain to someone that I'm on the run from my husband in fear of my life? How do I say that if I tell him the truth I am also endangering him and anyone who knows him? I won't and I can't do that to him.

"E…E…Edward I can't."

"What is so terrible that you can't tell me? Please Bella let me help you."

"You don't understand. Me being here, even now…." I whispered pausing "Edward I… Edward I am putting your life in danger."

I felt my eyes burn with tears that were threatening the flow. Just then the phone rang from down the hall.

"Alice… can you get that." He yelled never breaking eye contact with me. The phone continued to ring. "Alice!" The phone rang for the third.

"You better get it, it might be important." I said

"If it's that important they will call back."

"Edward, please go get the phone."

"This conversation is not over." He said. His eyes bore straight into mine, with that he turned and ran down the hall grabbing it before the last ring.

I turn onto my good side, grabbing my pillow and held it tight against my chest. I cried till I could feel his presence standing outside my door.

"Bella" he said softly

"Is it really so bad that telling me your real name will put my life in danger? All I want is to help you please just let me help you. Your body is covered in scars and bruises from both old and new injuries. For goodness sakes Bella, I found you bleeding to death on the floor with a twelve inch gash across your side, a broken wrist and multiple lacerations and bruises that are in no way self inflicted. You can't carry this burden by your..."

"Swan" I interrupted "My full name is Bella Swan." That was all I could risk giving him. I wanted to tell him that I was born and raised in Forks, Washington and that I had married my High School sweetheart who turned out to be a mentally deranged domestic abuser. I loved Mexican food, I collected old band t-shirts, I never left home without a pair converse and that I prefered be out in nature rather than indoors.

He smiled at me, the kind of smile that made my heart flutter.

"Thank you… Thank you for letting me in to your world just a little bit. Hopefully someday you will learn to trust me enough to let me in completely."

"Kay." Was all I could say.

"Get some sleep. Your body needs to keep healing." He said while slowly walking out of my room.

I couldn't sleep, I was still too scared of what I would see if I did. Instead I planned my unauthorized discharge. It was time for me to leave this place; as it was, I had over stayed my welcome. I needed to get moving and find a safe place to hide out from James. I would leave to night after Edward had left home. He had to go home. Didn't he? He had to sleep and eat and do all that kind of stuff. I would run back to the train tracks and wait for a train and hop on letting it take me to the other side of the country.

I will have to create a completely new identity, make up fake facts about my life, change my name, dye my hair… actually I probably wouldn't look good with any other hair color than brown. Blonde was out of the question; Black I'd turn out looking Gothic; I could probably pull off red because I was so fair skinned, but I really liked my hair color. Brown was classic, and it was me. I could always fake an accent; I've always wanted to be British. But I'd probably be absolutely horrible at it or forget to use it one day, completely ruining my cover; hopefully I'll just be able to blend in and go unnoticed.

I'll have no income so I am going to need a job, the last job I had was back in Forks during High School. I had worked at Newton's Sporting Goods for half a semester my senior year, but James made me quit because, one, it took too much time away from him and second Mike Newton had a crush on me, making James jealous.

But tonight was the night; I looked down at my hospital gown and groaned, there is no way I was going to run with my butt on display for the whole world. There was no sign of my clothes anywhere around the room. This was a serious problem, and would be a damper in my plans for tonight. I looked over at the digital clock on the side table.

What the heck, it's only 8:30 in the morning. My sense of time is completely off. I'm now going to have to wait all day long till I can actually set my plan in motion. I knew I needed to try and get some sleep before tonight, but there was no way with how restless my mind was. I looked back over towards the morphine button where the bright yellow sticky note was still attached.

Last time I pressed it approximating seven times, maybe if I only once or twice I'll be able to calm my nerves down enough to sleep for a couple of hours. I reached over and grabbed the button, without letting my fear get the best of me I pressed the button once. I lay back on my pillow with the button in my hand strewn across my abdomen. Warmth spread through my body and I instantly began to relax a little, one more dose would put me right out. I let my finger run around the edge of the button before I pressed it once more, my eyes felt heavy and my limbs felt heavy against the mattress, within moments I was overcome with unconsciousness.

I slowly regained consciousness gladly realizing I had slept without dreaming. The curtains had been opened to allow for sunlight to stream in the room, and for that I was grateful. The clock stated that it was only 11:27 am, in all honesty I wish that I had slept longer, I don't know how I'm going to deal with waiting for the rest of the day.

There was a tray next to my bed with a muffin, an orange and a glass of apple juice; the muffin was huge at least half the size of my head, but it looked absolutely delicious so I grabbed it greedily and took a giant bite. I moaned to utmost no-words-to-explain how delectable and scrumptiousness this muffin tasted. I worshiped the ground upon the baker of this muffin. I instantly became ravenous and dove in to take an even bigger bite just as the door swung open to reveal Edward, in a dark charcoal suit tailored to perfection, black skinny tie and hair still donning a perfectly messy style.

"Hungry?" he asked with a smile

I opened my mouth to respond forgetting the half of the muffin still shoved into my mouth sending crumbs everywhere. I threw my hands over my mouth causing Edward to break into a roar of laughter. I could have died from embarrassment. I tried to swallow the rest of my mouthful by chugging it down with half of the apple juice. By the time Edward was done laughing he could barely speak. I just looked past him still mortified.

"You know, you're absolutely gorgeous when you blush."

I grabbed the pillow and covered my face.

"Please don't hide from me." He said walking from the door coming next to my bed. He reached out and grabbed my forearm, to remove the pillow hiding my face. I unintentionally flinched cowering to the opposite side of my bed. He took a quick step back.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to, I'm sorry."

"It's fine." I said in a small voice "I didn't mean to jump like that"

"I'm still sorry."

"I'm ok really." I replied hugging the pillow to my chest.

"Are you sure?" He asked.

"Yes I'm sure" there was a long pause and I knew he was intently staring at me but I couldn't meet his gaze. "You look nice by the way." I said to break the silence

"Thanks that's kind of why I came in here." He said motioning to his suit "I have a meeting in Port Angelis at 1:00pm, so I came to let you know that Alice will be here if you need anything."

"Oh, ok." I muttered, sad that I would be missing out on my last few hours to spend with Edward. Not that it meant anything anyways. Right? I asked trying to convince my self that I believed that.

"I should be back in a couple hours, so if you need anything, anything at all just push the call button on the bed."

"I will." I replied

He smiled and turned to walk out the door.

"Edward!" I called out

"Yeah." He said looking over his shoulder

"Thanks."

"Anything for you Bella."

He walked out the door shutting it behind him and continued down the hall. I curled up in a ball and began to process all that just happened.

First, Edward had called me gorgeous; in all my years I have never had a man call me beautiful. My father had always been really reserved and never found it his place to talk to me, let alone extend a complement towards me. With James it was always criticism and even when we were back in high school he was never genuine, instead of calling me pretty he would tell me I was hot or that my butt looked good in the jeans I was wearing. But with Edward I could hear the sincerity in his voice when he spoke to me; it was thrilling and it excited me to just be with him.

But then there was the fact that I was having a hard time being with Edward, because of the fear of James kept getting in the way. It frustrated me that I uncontrollably recoiled back from Edward when he simply touched my arm this morning. I wanted to be able to be around him without fear confining me from being who I really wanted to be. I loved that he seemed so genuinely and concerned with my well being. He even spoke as if he hoped I would be around for a while. Unfortunately that would not be the case, if all went according to planned; I would be gone and on my way across the country by night fall.

**A/N: **That's all folks, well till next chapter that is. I hope you guys enjoyed it and I look forward to your opinions and input.


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